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Busting Myths around Virginity and Its Mythical Guardian

Intercourse could permeate our widespread tradition, however conversations about it are nonetheless related to stigma and disgrace in Indian households. In consequence, most people coping with sexual well being points or looking for details about intercourse typically resort to unverified on-line sources or comply with the unscientific recommendation of their buddies.

To handle the widespread misinformation about intercourse, The Press is working this weekly intercourse column, titled ‘Let’s Speak Intercourse’, each Friday. We hope to provoke conversations about intercourse by way of this column and tackle sexual well being points with scientific perception and nuance.

The column is being written by Sexologist Prof (Dr) Saransh Jain. In as we speak’s column, Dr Jain busts myths round virginity and its legendary guardian, the hymen.

The phrase virginity is usually understood to seek advice from somebody who has by no means had intercourse, however that leaves plenty of room for interpretation. Does oral intercourse depend? If a girl solely has intercourse with different ladies, is she a virgin? And so forth. Loads of myths about virginity are sometimes accepted as the reality.

Virginity has an advanced historical past, and has typically been (incorrectly) linked to breaking of the hymen. Hymen is a skinny membrane which covers or partially covers the doorway to the vagina. In lots of cultures, earlier than a girl is married, her hymen is examined to find out whether or not or not she is a virgin. The morning after marriage, bloody sheets are seen as an indication that the lady has ‘misplaced’ her virginity.

Listed below are some widespread myths about virginity:

Delusion 1: The hymen should break the primary time you will have intercourse.

The most important fable concerning the hymen is that it breaks when a girl has intercourse for the primary time, and that this leads to bleeding, an indication that she was a virgin. In actuality, many ladies don’t expertise tearing of the hymen or bleeding the primary time they’ve intercourse. That’s as a result of the hymen can stretch.

Due to this fable, many ladies fear about ache and bleeding the primary time they’ve intercourse, which may make it tougher to get turned on. When a girl is aroused, the muscle mass close to the opening of the vagina are relaxed, and the vagina creates pure lubrication in order that intercourse is extra snug—even when it’s the primary time. Worrying about ache can result in tightening of the muscle mass and fewer lubrication, which may result in ache or bleeding.

Delusion 2: A gynecologist can inform from wanting on the hymen if a girl is virgin.

It’s generally believed {that a} healthcare skilled by way of an examination of a girl’s hymen can differentiate between a virgin and a non-virgin. That is removed from fact. Hymen can stretch and one’s virginity standing hardly makes an influence on it.

Delusion 3: Your associate can inform your standing.

Many ladies fear their associate can inform if they’re virgin or not. The reality is your hymen doesn’t reveal your virginity standing, and even skilled medical specialists can’t inform whether or not you’re a virgin or not. Nonetheless, sharing your sexual historical past together with your associate will assist construct belief and enhance intimacy.

Delusion 4: Ache throughout your first intercourse is simply your hymen breaking.

The ache ladies expertise the primary time they’ve intercourse is often not as a result of hymen-breaking. Actually, the explanation it hurts a lot might be as a result of the lady is nervous and has bother getting aroused and lubricated, which might result in a painful insertion; or each companions could also be inexperienced and over-eager, which may result in a minor damage. In each instances, it’s most certainly your vaginal tissue that’s bleeding, not your hymen.

Delusion 5: Penetrative vaginal intercourse is the core marker of your virginity.

As per conventional beliefs, solely when a penis enters the vagina, it’s intercourse. It is a redundant, false and misogynistic definition of intercourse as a result of it doesn’t account for queer intercourse or different types of expressing sexuality. Whether or not or not one thing “counts” as intercourse typically varies, based mostly on these components:

* Consent

* Ejaculation/ orgasm

* Period

* Intention

* Penetration

This simply exhibits that there isn’t anybody definitive marker of intercourse. Penetrative vaginal intercourse is simply one of many some ways to specific sexuality. The way you outline intercourse is as much as you. There isn’t any must let exterior perceptions outline your virginity.

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